Things You Don't Say to a Pregnant Woman

Even though this post doesn't really have anything to do with products or babies or life after having a baby, I couldn't resist. This post makes me smile. Not because I liked it when people said some of these things to me, but because as someone who has been pregnant, I can look at these and go, Amen! I imagine you can too on most of these.

 

When I was pregnant, there were just certain things that would irritate me, hurt my feelings, or just annoy me if people said them to me. I think most pregnant women are in the same boat. However, I never told anyone that it did. I know their intentions were good and I didn't want to be rude. So even if you haven't been pregnant, are pregnant, or have been pregnant, think about these before saying them even if they don't bother you.

 

1) Are you sure you aren't having twins? or Good luck with twins! I have one and can't handle him!

To a pregnant women these means, man you are really fat. She already feels big enough, don't make her feel bigger! 

To tell a mommy that you can't handle one baby when they are having two will probably only heighten their anxiety about two babies. I am sure mommy is already nervous about it and she needs encouragement like "You can do this! You will be a great mom to twins because you are so.....(organized, loving, etc.)"

 

2) You look like you are about to explode!

Most mommies feel like saying, "Yes. I know my belly is huge, my face is swollen along with every other body part, and I look like an alien, but there is no need for you to tell me too!" If you think they look very large, good for you, but keep it to yourself.

 

3) My wife, mom, sister, friend, etc. never got as big as you with her pregnancies.

Do I need to even explain this one? Even woman is different and pregnancy is different for every woman and her body.

 

4) How are you feeling?

This one in and of itself is not a bad question. Most people honestly are caring about how you are feeling. That is awesome! This can just get tiresome for a mommy because she answers this question constantly. It is one of the most common pregnancy questions. Don't ask it every single time you see her. Chances are, she feels about the same she did yesterday when you saw her. Ask her every now and then.

 

5) Are you pregnant?
NEVER, never, I repeat, never ask this question. Under no circumstances do you ask a woman if she is pregnant. She may not be and then you are in a world of trouble. Just wait until you know for sure!

 

6) Get all the sleep you can now.

To be honest, I hated when people told me this because SO.MANY.PEOPLE. told me this. It is true, I do agree with them. However, it got really old, really quick. And to be honest with you, you cannot truly prepare someone for how tired they will truly be when they have a baby. Again, this is not a "bad" statement, but believe me, she has heard this advice many times already!

 

7) Enjoy everything now while you can!

I am conflicted on this statement. Yes I do think you should do things before the baby that are harder to do with a baby (big trips, big expenses, big decisions, being spontaneous, etc.) but, I also don't like this statement because it makes it seem as though you will never have fun again as a parent. Yes, it is more difficult to plan and do things, but it can be done! And it should be done. Just because you have a baby doesn't mean your fun will end or that it should end. It just looks different.

 

8) You are going to breastfeed right?

Not all mommies feel as though breastfeeding is the best option for them or their baby. Plus, not all mommies can breastfeed, even if they wanted to. If you are really interested, ask "Are you going to formula feed or breastfeed?" This is a much nicer way of getting your answer and doesn't put any guilt on the mommy.

 

9) Do not point out any ailments on mommy.

For example, do not point out that she has varicose veins, stretch marks, etc. I guarantee, she has already picked them out and is self-conscious of them.

 

 

10) I can't believe you are having a boy. I could see you with a girl better. (Or vice versa)

What a Debbie Downer comment. Maybe mommy seems like she would be better with the opposite gender, and maybe she is already feeling that way and doesn't need more thoughts that way. I guarantee that mommy will fall in love with her bundle of joy and adapt however she needs to.

 

Can I get an amen ladies!? I hope this helps those who just simply don't know to understand how things often come off to pregnant women. Remember, our hormones are going crazy! Give comments and/or advice with some caution and thought about the mommy!

 

 

Until next time,